costinbabyblog

P.N.E.!

2010-08-27T10:25:00.000-07:00

Where else can a two-year-old see Rolf Harris, Wayne Newton, ride a helicopter and a train, and visit a fake barnyard all in one day for free?

Funny Cat

2010-08-24T21:47:00.001-07:00

We were at Robert's Creek visiting Auntie Marsha yesterday (Sunshine Coast). The neighbour's cat came over for a visit and fun (see the ring flying through the air in these photos). Watch the fun on the videos!

Shuswap!

2010-08-10T10:22:00.001-07:00

Olivia looked at these pictures today, and said "Go there?" when she saw the pool table. She said "Hi Auntie Laura" when she saw the video of the kite flying and drumming with Uncle Mike. Ryan and Maria took her out on the boat to watch Mike innertube. She had a lot of fun at the lake!

Home Sweet Home

2010-08-09T09:07:00.000-07:00

We're back from a great vacation at Shuswap Lake. I'm not saying Olivia didn't have a good time with Auntie Laura, Uncle Mike, Auntie Maria, and Uncle Ryan, and her mom and dad, but it's fun to see her enjoy being home. Within 20 minutes of waking this morning she: 1) asked for her dance floor to be put down (four spongy plastic tiles that fit together like a puzzle), 2) painted 3 watercolours, 3) played outside (she slid down her slide on the patio), 4) played with her dolls that didn't come on the trip (she said "do you remember me?" as she played with them), and 5) pretend slept (lying under the covers and soon after yelling "WAKE UP!") - we wish she could sleep well for REAL!, - and 6) she didn't ask for a video! Olivia is happy: happy to be home, and happy to travel with her family.

Rock and Roll All Night and Potty Everyday. (well, maybe once a day)

2010-07-26T23:16:00.000-07:00

If you're not careful, the expectations and pressures from everyone around you can drive you mad. When it was close to the milestone we were constantly bombarded with people telling us we needed to put her on her stomach as she would never crawl. Then everyone seemed to want to drag her around by her arms trying to make her walk. Now I've noticed that there are lots of people that take their baby's bottle away from them at a very young age, and I'm not sure why? I was even told "Only babies drink from bottles". Well, what is 2? A teenager? In this day and age where we are so afraid of kids growing up too fast, wouldn't it be good to be more relaxed about this type of thing? I mean she's not 8 walking around sucking on a bottle? Now we're reaching potty training time and I've been told:

1) Lazy parents have babies who potty train late or slow

2) Reward her with treats like a dog. One person (who shall remain nameless...you know who you are!) even said she used this tactic because that's how they trained RETARDED kids!!hahahahahahaha

3) You have to make it a full time project or she won't respond. What -will she poo in her pants forever if I don't teach her? All I know is I don't like to poo my pants. Do you?

The ridiculous thing about this parenthood job is, even though it's one of the hardest projects you will ever have, human beings are pretty amazing and evolved. It seems that everything she has needed to do, she has definitely done in her own time and not outside of the regular scope of what "they" say is "normal" (who are THEY and what the hell IS normal?....do I sound like Andy Rooney?hahaha)

And breastfeeding. Please don't judge. I'm not going to be one of those moms who pulls my boob out in the middle of a store or restaurant, I'm very conscious of it and she doesn't really want it that much, but I am choosing to wean her slowly. (regardless, this isn't any of your business, those of you who seem to have an opinion) There have been so many different trends and generations that are so vastly different. Really whatever works best for people should be tolerated. Why does it have to be such a big deal? I know from family members I get offside comments when she asks for "Bo" (her word for boob) that she's too big for that. Just stop already. YOU are too big for it so stop acting like somebody should stick a boob in YOUR mouth!!! DOH.....is that my outside voice?

Should I tell you how I REALLY feel?

On a lighter note, and playing on the other part of the title - Rock and Roll is something Olivia says daily. She dances daily to KISS. While I don't have a video of her with that music, here is one with the Dixie Chicks from a while back. (she's over them now and refuses to dance to this song, although if I sing it she identifies it as Dixie Chicks)

Parental Bias?

2010-07-25T23:58:00.000-07:00

So, I used to roll my eyes as a dance teacher when people told me their child was "gifted" or "special" (clap-clap). And now, here I am, a parent......and I fight saying something of the sort about my own child. I don't want to be one of those bragging parents. I still remember being in the hospital, the day after Olivia was born, hearing Bill tell someone on the phone "She's a smart baby" and thinking, What the hell? How can you tell how SMART she is? Her eyes are barely open!? But then as the day wore on, this little tiny person had such an intense stare. It was like she had some extreme purpose for being here right from her first breath. If you look back in our blog, you can see that she was put in intensive care where she promptly ripped a feeding tube out of her nose letting everyone know what she would stand for. This kid has spirit, let me tell you. And as much as it makes things challenging, it is the most unbelievable example of life to me. Yes, I'm exhausted and no, she doesn't sleep very much. But I wouldn't have it any other way. She is one of the most interesting, intuitive, funny people I have ever met. (my mom says she's restless because I tapped danced too much while I was pregnant!)

She is surrounded by dynamic, open minded, cool, artsy people and it is only adding to this. We are so lucky to have such cool people in our lives and she feels very social with them all . Anytime I answer the phone she says "Mama, who dat?". And then she picks up the extension some of the time and says "Come over". Her new thing is trying to hold hands with everyone. She has also taken it upon herself to introduce us all at the park, "This is dada (or a few times "Bill") and Mama", and then she points to herself, "Olivia!".

One of the things she really loves is coming to the "Tappy" studio. Here is a clip from a while back of her tapping in her party dress. (yes, how annoying - dance clips of my child. Well, you're here reading, aren't you?)

Jennifer

Colours!

2010-07-16T10:00:00.000-07:00

This is one of Olivia's favorite videos right now: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2aimaqnRJPM. It's called Peep of a different color. Birds find cans of paint and change their own colors.

Olivia knows red, blue, purple, yellow, and pink. We started calling them Elmo red, Big Bird Yellow, and Abby pink, etc. She was saying this last January in Maui. There was a big flower by our room outside. She would say "Elmo red" every time we passed it.

Now she's painting and getting to know colours even better!

Hanging on the patio

2010-07-09T10:51:00.000-07:00

We have a patio that is almost the same size as our apartment inside. It's 500 square feet, and is totally saving us right now with Olivia. We have a water slide (it hooks up to a hose and sprays water down the plastic slide) from Susinn Macfarlane, a Barbie blow up wading pool (our neighbour, Christine, brought home from a corporate booze up - the beer was in there), a "step 2" wagon from David Marr and Kathleen Barr, a "little tikes" toy riding car (from Aunt Faye), and a "little tikes" table (also from Barr/Marr) full of poster paints and brushes. Right now Olivia is sitting with her DVD player and a stack of 19 DVDs. You're probably thinking, "she shouldn't be watching DVDs". So what. I wouldn't be writing in the blog if we were doing any of the other activities on the patio. She is watching one DVD for 30 seconds, then changing it herself, and watching another DVD for another 30 seconds, etc.

Donna, the neighbour upstairs hangs over her balcony and talks to her frequently. She often calls "DONNA!" like Romeo to Juliet. Donna comes out most of the time. It's a great setup, and makes it hard to find a place bigger (with a bedroom for Olivia) that has the same patio.

OK, that's it for today.

Bill

OK! We're back!

2010-07-08T08:41:00.000-07:00

It has been 15 months since we wrote anything here. It probably means that those months are the most difficult in child rearing, because it has gone by in a flash! Olivia's 2nd birthday was last Friday (See photos). I wanted to make sure we recorded two things at age two: 1) her height (pediatritians and new age types say that if you double a baby's height at age two, you will find her adult height), and 2) what she can say an do at age two.

1) Her height is 2' 91/4" which means she will be exactly 5' 61/2' when she is full grown.

2) Songs she sings: Elmo's World Theme, Jingle Bells (sung with one word from the Elmo show. The first song she ever sang was "Sky Sky Sky" sung to the tune of jingle bells. She even called Elmo "Sky" for about 12 months), March March Robots, Itsy Bitsy Spider, Songs from Mary Martin's Peter Pan: (I'm flying, Tender Shepherd, I gotta crow), Caillou Theme, Hold out your hand, Gumby Theme Song, Twinkle Twinkle Little Star, Thomas the Tank Engine Theme, Ring around the rosy, Barney's Theme song (I love you, you love me) .... there are more, but these are the main ones. You can tell we let her watch DVDs. So what.

Word vocabulary: Take it. NO! Toys? Phone. Bath. Car. Mama's Car, Dada's car, Uh oh, Hug, That one, bee, baby, bug, (Sesame street characters) Abbey, Oscar, Cookie Monster, Grover, Elmo, big bird, Ernie, etc., what's that? Gumby and Pokey, ice cream, oh thank-you mama, real thomas the train, grandma, grandpa, Laura, Mike, Faye, Marsha, Byron, Betsy, Kathi, Christine, Virginia, Emily, Teryl, Londyn, Saige, Brooke, Sanders, Cailin, Matilda, Amelia, Barb, (sorry if I missed anyone). Mama's at work, bottle, Dora (the explorer), what are you doing? where are you going? hockey, who's that? (she says this alot when we say hi to a stranger), want to go to the PARK? Baby do it. Olivia.

Physical: she can jump with both feet off one stair onto the ground without wiping out. Open an umbrella (but can't close it), dance to "rock 'n roll all night" by Kiss, yoga, jumping in place, tap dances with shoes on, spins, pour water from one cup into another only spilling about half, climb into her car seat, climb onto a high stool, sit on the stool and eat dinner (instead of her high chair),

OK, that's enough for today. The intention is to write here more often. Let's hope it happens.

Merry Belated Christmas!

2009-04-05T00:29:00.000-07:00

Okay, babies are a lot of work. There has been no time to edit photos and videos. We are taking them, but obviously we aren't posting them here.

We went to Hawaii in February. You'll see photos from that trip at some point. But before it gets too warm, I want to at least post our Christmas videos:

Christmas part 1:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=thpzErEIBV0

Christmas part 2:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LgjzGfIdQAM

Aloha!

NEW PICTURES

2008-11-11T21:56:00.000-08:00

I know, I know...how bad of us as new parents to not post MORE pictures. The truth of the matter is, my digital camera is on the fritz and I just haven't had time to go and buy one. So, we wait for the old fashioned "roll" of film to be finished and develop. (I hate taking random pictures to just use a roll up...so it took me a while to get through it)

I promise, perhaps this weekend I will acquire a new digital camera and the blog will be flooded with new pics week after week.

Or...I could be up to my eyeballs in diapers and a teething baby and not even get out of my pjs.

Sigh

BJORN AGAIN

2008-10-20T13:54:00.000-07:00

In the first three weeks or so of Olivia's life, I sported her around in a baby sling feeling so great that she was all snuggled up, womb-like against my body. Within a short time frame she became very agitated having to have her legs and arms all bundled in, not being able to see out.

This is where one of the hand-me-downs we received came in. The Baby Bjorn. What a fabulous invention! Like a back back (except on the front of your body....a front pack? whatever) it allows the baby's legs and arms to flail about. Small babies are supposed to face towards you as their necks aren't strong enough yet. Well, not our little peanut. She is determined to act like a big kid. She faces out, with her chin not far over the edge (a la Kilroy)and lets her head drop to the side when she falls asleep...all while still insisting to face outward.

We have found that this particular baby bjorn is missing the lumbar support so we are off to buy a new one with a lumbar support, knowing it will be put to good use.

As we walk along, Olivia chats away to passers by and kicks her legs "giddy-up" if you stop too long. This weekend Bill, Olivia, Barb and I went on a hike and she was so happy the whole time. Her cheeks nice and rosie. See the great pics Barb took with her camera?

Jennifer

MY BIG, BIG COUSIN

2008-09-18T20:28:00.001-07:00

Olivia has a few cousins. One of them is Byron. He lives the closest to us. Bill was the baby in his family by quite a few years, making his nieces and nephews older than most would have.

Olivia's cousin, Byron turns 30 this year and he was quite into the books "Olivia" that a friend of ours gave to us. He towers a good 6 foot 5 or so! He was almost more amused by the Olivia books than Olivia herself!

Check out more about the Olivia books. She's quite precocious:

http://www.oliviathepiglet.com/

NEW PICTURES

2008-09-18T20:28:00.000-07:00

Soon to come....audio of Olivia! She is now VERY vocal. She's having regular conversation (in her own language, of course.

REALIZATIONS

2008-09-12T15:53:00.000-07:00

OLIVIA LOVE COSTIN'S TRAILER DOOR:

MAIA LOVE & OLIVIA LOVE

ARTIST PARENTS The reality that Bill and I have the perfect lifestyle for raising a child.

Our schedules are so flexible that we are able to spend lots of time together as a family as well as individual time with Olivia. This allows both of us to continue on doing the things we are doing in our careers, that is - for the most part......

Babies take up lots of your time. I do not in any way, say this begrudgingly, it's just a fact that I have realized. (I know, I know...a million people told me ...but you don't know until you're in it) I love every minute I spend with Olivia. She is so cute and full of such possibility. Our friend Susin made a great analogy: She said that babies arrive as who they are but they just peel away layers to expose more and more about themselves. It's wonderful watching in anticipation as she shows us her funny personality. (watch...she'll be a totally serious child and think her parents are nuts).

On Mondays Bill heads to Nanaimo early in the morning to teach at Malaspina (which is now called Vancouver Island University). He teaches all day Monday and Tuesday and comes home on Tuesday night. This leaves Olivia and I without him for two two days. Let me tell you, I salute the women of my mother's generation who's husbands went to work every day leaving them daily to take care of the house and child. When they say being a "housewife" (what is the NOW term for that? Domestic engineer? whatever!) is a full time job, they are right. It's amazing how you learn new time management skills! Juggling the baby, anything that needs to be done around here, along with my own business tasks is wild.

I just have to say how great of a dad Bill is. Olivia taking bottles of expressed milk now and they have spent a few successful mornings hanging out. She has the funniest look on her face when he's feeding her. "YOU have a boob TOO?!!!"

OH GOD, WHY AM I EXPLOITING MY CHILD? (follow up to Show Biz Baby...see the link to the call sheet from the film : http://www.billcostin.com/talent/CD2_D2_Call_Sheet[1].pdf

Well, Olivia's first big "gig" and mom wants to back peddle. After one whole day without Bill here (geez I feel so spoilt whining about that...get over it, Jennifer) and a night alone, just little Olivia and I, we got up and ready for our call time on "Cats & Dogs 2", 12:30.

On the way there I began to feel anxious about saying yes and felt bad thinking about little Olivia and how she had no choice in the matter, her mom just DRAGGING her around. Ugh...I got a little teary thinking about it, realizing that it wasn't really an option to back out at that point. It was a beautiful day and I calmed down, reminding myself how many times I just literally sat around and got paid on various TV/Film sets. That's right, there's a good chance we wouldn't have to do anything.

As I arrived I immediately felt a little better seeing a young couple struggle to lug all of their baby things out of their car. (This was Maia Love, baby # 3, the producer's baby, Zoe was baby #1, of course!) We arrived to sign in with the baby wrangler, (named Jennifer as a matter of fact!) and were ushered to our trailers! Not so bad, we have our own little room to hang out in. Washroom, couch, sink, tv & stereo. We were told just to relax and that everyone would be heading for lunch soon. (how do you like that...we arrive just in time to stuff our faces!)

I made a little nest out of blankets on the couch for Olivia and she immediately went to sleep while the baby next door cried and cried. I fill out our paperwork, leaving "Love" out of her name (didn't want them to confuse her with MAIA Love) and give the info to Jennifer. I was given an extensive package on the rules and rights for children working in TV & Film. They have really gone a long way to protect kids in this business. It was reassuring.

A knock at the door..and we are off to have lunch. I put Olivia in a baby sling and she wakes up a little but quickly goes back to sleep. I have an amazing lunch (zucchini and red pepper cakes, salad with peppered goat's cheese, caramelized pecans and green apples and for dessert, this amazing cake) The young couple with the other baby chow down on short ribs, mashed potatoes of some sort, Coca cola, cake and candy.....(eeeek...later her baby had a very upset stomach....hmmmm?) The lady running the catering truck came out to see Olivia and yells back to the kitchen "Look, a c-section baby!". ?????? She said she knew because of how perfect Olivia's head and face were. She wanted her daughter, working with her to see the baby as she is campaigning for a grandchild herself.

We head back to the trailer and are on a 20 minute call before we will head to set. Jennifer instructs us to feed first and then change the babies. I confidently announce 'Oh no, she won't likely have any accidents" (ba-ha-ha-ha....never think you can predict what your baby will do..another lesson) I feed Olivia and put her into her outfit. Shortly after she has an EXPLOSIVE POO that goes everywhere. I was thinking that I would give her a fresh diaper before we head to set....only to be surprised by the bowl 'o' poo. It even got on her wardrobe...hahhahaha! The wardrobe lady took it away, got the stain out and returned it like nothing happened. (the magic of film!)

A van arrives and takes us to a mobile home just outside the house they are filming in. The long and short of it - we basically spend the rest of the time hanging out, Olivia sleeping. When they finally call for a baby, the young couple with Maia, jump up and volunteer right away. I am relieved and think this is great. I am actually achieving the "do nothing and get paid for it" goal.

They come back after the scene, I guess successful. At this point, it's time for everyone to eat again (the babies) So I feed Olivia and as I'm in the middle of changing her diaper to head back I am told we are wrapped for the day! YIPPPEEE!

So we spent a total of 6 hours there. Olivia stayed so relaxed (as did I) and she was even quite jolly as we left.

A sigh of relief and a little promise to seriously reconsider doing that all again. (I'm sure it was harder on me than her!)

BABYSITTER EXTRAORDINAIRE - The "smother" mother rules!

My dear friend, Betsy always calls herself a "smother mother" implying (I think) that she was overly protective of her daughter, Hannah. Well Betsy, I've said it before and here it is in print: It must be the way, because I think you've raised a pretty super human being!

Betsy has been by my side, so excited through my whole pregnancy and was so disappointed she couldn't be here when Olivia was born. She's so into babies - I'm lucky to have her around!

In an effort to exercise some child care, I asked if she would take care of Olivia for a few hours while I taught yesterday. Most new moms would feel nervous leaving their baby for the first time, but I didn't think twice leaving her at Betsy's house. I knew she would be so taken care of X 100!

I returned to find a very happy Betsy, baby and Hannah hanging out in the living room together. (Thank you Betsy & Hannah!)

SHOW BIZ BABY

2008-09-05T17:22:00.000-07:00

Just the other day Bill and I were talking about people who's baby was chosen as a model for a baby clothing store. We talked about show business and babies. I used to work as a casting assistant and I witnessed a fair amount of disfunction between parents and kids at auditions (Think Danny Bonaduce's reality show...ugh) One thing we have on our side is realizing the reality of the business and not getting all googly about our baby being a "star".

Well, yesterday out of the blue we receive a phone call from a talent agent inquiring about Olivia. Turns out a performer friend of ours recommended Olivia to her as they were looking for a baby for a feature film "Cats & Dogs 2". I had to send her "stats"...hahah:

Name: Olivia Love Costin
Parent: Jennifer Bishop & Bill Costin
Age: 9 weeks
Weight: 9lbs
Length: 54.5cm
Hair: brown
Eyes: blue

And I sent these details along with her frog picture...hahahah!

The long and short of it, Olivia is booked for her first film gig.

Here are the details:

- She is booked along with 2 other babies (coincidentally one of the baby's names is Maia Love! They use whatever baby is sleeping at the time for the scene. If a baby is fussing they just let them settle and get what they need and work with one of the other babies.

- They can only use a baby for 15 minutes at a time. (with I think, 20 minutes in between)

- They have to pay us $27/hr for a minimum of 8 hours no matter how long we spend there. (will likely be a short day...one little scene)

- They can only book babies during the day time.

- The category is SAE - Special Ability Extra (used to be Special Skills Extra in the day I did film work!) I guess her special ability is being a cute baby?

- It's close to our house!

So, she and I will spend Tuesday hanging out on a film set, eating great food (there is always ridiculous amounts of great food on set) and doing what we do with little 15 minutes of fame scattered in.

How crazy. My child is only 9 weeks old and is on her way to having more success in film than her mother.

Jennifer

Hanging out with Olivia

2008-08-30T18:38:00.000-07:00

Olivia is over 2 months old! We've noticed big changes. August 9th was provoked smiling. She smiles at things instead of just passing gas. That's big. Also, she goes two days without pooing. We also got through a major crying stage. From 4pm to midnight, she was really fussy each night. We are getting over that now. We think it had to do with the no pooing thing. Also, babies just do that at 2 months.

So, here are some clips of hanging out with Olivia (click on link below):

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=I61v2B_ZUYw

Also, she loves being read to. Check out her bedtime story:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_5-Bi1rCEIE

These videos are great, but take a long time to put on this blog. We'll probably do this monthly.

Cheers, Bill and Jennifer.

Tummy Tub Two!

2008-08-07T10:58:00.000-07:00

We went to Grandma and Grandpa's house in Kamloops over the weekend (Grandpa's birthday). Here is bathtime with them (click on link):

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5E3WvOcS3IA

Don't forget to breastfeed at H & M anytime you want ladies!

Baby reunion party

2008-07-27T20:29:00.000-07:00

Olivia went to her first party with people her own age. It was our prenatal class postnatal reunion party. She is the one sleeping in the middle. Click on the link. Check it out:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BCpVtmhvYSE

She's Gaining Weight (it's a good thing!)

2008-07-18T14:56:00.000-07:00

2185 grams 2409 grams 2566 grams! (SHE IS HUGE!)

Olivia has had the finest diet team in the land

(Jennifer and Bill) force feeding her around the clock!

Here are the results!

SEE SCIENTIFIC GROWTH TABLE AND CHART BELOW!

Most babies gain about 10 grams per day. You do the math! She is gaining over 24 grams per day! That's twice as much as normal! At this rate, she will be over 40lbs by Christmas! Bigger than a turkey! Stay tuned for more updates.

First Bath!

2008-07-17T06:09:00.001-07:00

Click on this link to see her first bath at home:

http://youtube.com/watch?v=oRhatUjkJMQ

Doctor Doctor, give me the news!

2008-07-14T14:46:00.000-07:00

I don't like doctors. It's not because it hurts when I get a shot, or when they stick something in one of my orifices. It's because I don't like doctors.

Let me start again. I like doctors who can fix tangible problems: a broken arm, an artery that has come loose, acne, varicose veins, cataracts, open heart surgery, c-section births, vag births... you know, things that can actually be fixed. (I love saying vag birth because I know it's on the verge of being naughty, yet still a medical term)

Today we went to our second pediatrician. We fired our first pediatrician for bad bedside manner and being ESL. I know that sounds slightly racist, but when it's your kid, and there is a question of whether she's going to be healthy, you want someone explaining things to you in your mother tongue.

I can understand if you travelled pregnant in say, Nepal, and had a baby there. You would accept broken English while hearing your baby's diagnosis (or hearing it through an interpreter). Children's Hospital in Vancouver is a different story. I think it was more a combination of ESL and this doctor talking at us like we weren't really there. I can imagine her in med school learning to talk to parents using neoprene "parent" dolls to explain a baby's ailments to.

This is also the doctor who scooped Olivia from us on her second night, and sent her to the nursery to sleep in an incubator with the other incubator babies. Of course, I'm not complaining about sending her to the nursery. It was in Olivia's best interest, (I think). The explanation went something like this: "Mom and dad must know that baby's blood sugar is low, and the nurses down in the nursery are very good at bottle feeding, yeah? So baby is going to nursery for awhile. Good-bye. Oh, and don't forget to buy Nestle's Good Start Baby Formula". After we figured out it was Jennifer (mom!), and Bill (dad!), and Olivia (baby!), we were crushed to have to walk with our new baby downstairs to the nursery to watch them shove a feeding tube down her nose into her stomache (yes she cried, and so did we), and then leave her there hooked up to monitoring equipment.

The next morning (4 hours later), there was no tube in her nose. "She pulled it out", said one of the nurses. (way to go Olivia!). And they never put it back in because she was feeding well from a bottle. So, Jennifer and I fed her from a bottle for two days in the nursery. Couldn't they have just taught us how to feed her from a bottle and let us keep her? We are still feeding her. Now she's bi: breast and bottle. She is a very talented little girl. Why didn't they just teach us to bottle feed her in the first place? You get long silences from the health establishments when you ask such questions.

Doctors and nurses love machines. It's just like Monty Python's The Meaning Of Life. Even if you don't like Monty Python, just watch the first 15 minutes of this movie. It's hilarious. So Olivia is in the nursery hooked up to a machine that goes "ping" (you'll get this if you watch the movie), and then... the machine goes... PING!

What!? As a parent, your heart drops, and you start looking around. She looks fine, but there are wires hooked up to her feet and chest, and at the other end is a machine that is setting off an alarm. No nurse comes running over, they still keep doing what they are doing in other parts of the nursery looking completely relaxed. I'm looking around, and finally, someone just yells over, "is she pink?" (referring to her skin). "Yes!" I say. "Then just hit the reset button". After this happened a dozen times, I was conditioned to look at Olivia to see if she was pink, then push the reset button to stop the beeping. Couldn't we have just kept her out of the nursery, watched to see if she was pink, and fed her from a bottle?

We have fired other medical professionals during Jennifer's pregnancy with Olivia. We fired the midwife. Actually we fired all the midwives at the midwife clinic. We also fired the prenatal doctors at Women's Hospital. We ended up with one fabulous obstetrician: Debra Millar, instead.

Why all this firing? I believe it's our right to ask for proper care. As parents, we don't know what proper medical care is in the moment, but we can figure out pretty fast if things are making sense. I hate to compare this to how George Bush runs his country (it makes us look bad as parents), but its similar. George really doesn't know how to properly look after those people down there in the U.S.A.: it's too complicated. Experts show him all the options, and he picks the best one. The difference between he and us is that we care about the end result. We don't have just 4 more years of parenting (or six more months as of today - HURRAY!).

Who in the medical community came up with the term "false positive?". False positive was the result of Jennifer's triple screen pregnancy test back in December. From that day forward, we knew we were in trouble.

What if I used that term in my work? If I hit a wrong note, or played a song in a wrong key while accompanying a jazz singer, could I get away with it by saying: "yes, that was a false positive passage of music" - with a straight face?

You get terms like false positive (or just plain silence) when we are in qualitative limbo no man's land of medical explanations. Jennifer was dragged into Women's Hospital for ultra sound after ultra sound, fetal monitoring after fetal monitoring, and blood pressure test after blood pressure test because of the false positive results in December. All tests came back normal.

Only twice were the results abnormal:

We went to a private ultra sound clinic. The baby's measurements came back as no growth from the last ultra sound. The moment I heard this, I figured "different machines, different results". You get a blank, silent answer when you bring this up with medical staff. Their answer was, you guessed it, more tests. Why not check the machine?
Jennifer's blood pressure scored high as a result of our frustration with a prenatal doctor and her insistence of continuing with the tests. We told her we felt like lab rats. After more heated discussion, she took Jennifer's blood pressure. Surprise! It was high! The result of this test? Even more tests.

We finally asked for Debra Millar, obstetrician. It was a great move: everybody out of the pool! And you know what? There were no more tests. Don't forget to ask for the specialist!

Yesterday, pediatrician number two (the one who is still working for us) said, "let's put all the small baby/placenta problems behind us. You have a normal baby".

Thanks. That's what we wanted to hear. We don't want to hear "come in for another test", or "feed the baby more than she wants to eat".

Now Jennifer is breast feeding Olivia when Olivia is hungry. What a concept! No Nestle's anything. No false positives. No more dragging Olivia out of bed to force feed her around the clock. Again, hindsight is 20/20. If there were problems, we would have invested more faith in the medical community. In our case though, we knew they were just covering their own asses.

We've been hearing stories of babies in the prairies decades ago who were two pounds at birth. Mothers would put them in a shoe box with cotton and olive oil by an open fire. Some of those babies grew to strapping 6' tall farmers. Some of them probably died. We are thankful that there are modern machines that tell us how well we are. It tips the odds in our favour. During labour, Olivia's heart rate kept dropping. We knew this thanks to fetal monitoring. It helped us know to have a c-section. It probably saved her life.

If you know us, you know we have chosen a different lifestyle in the arts. I guess the alternative lifestyle is spreading into our biology as well. No problem. We roll with all kinds of strange scenarios daily. And, all three of us now are getting along famously, or if you ask one of those midwives: infamously.

Father's Labour Day

2008-07-11T17:54:00.000-07:00

The memories are coming back. It was hard to watch. I think most dads who experience labour leave out a lot of information when they report the incident. You don't want to see someone you love go through the pain of labour, but you want the outcome: a safe, happy family.

The prenatal classes were great, but really, what can a guy do when his significant other is wrything in pain, toning, and basically wanting to go through this on her own? I don't blame her. Would you want someone in your face while you're having a tooth pulled saying "that's great honey, the root is almost loose, just a little longer, keep toning, keep looking around the room, do you want morphine now? How about if I hold your hand?"

Of course the prenatal courses were full of great information, but when it came down to the actual contractions, what could I really do? Just be there I guess. It was about 24 hours of hard labour, and at about 16 hours in, I found myself just sitting beside Jennifer's mom, watching.

It was like sitting ring side at the main event. You don't cheer though, and really, you don't give much sympathy. What's the point? Jennifer was in too deep. She says it felt like she was drunk at a party and people were helping her sober up. She sat in the shower because people told her to. The shower lasted about 5 minutes. Her and I tried the positions we learned in class (one position had her in a deep squat while I held her up). That lasted 5 minutes. One position worked where she leaned on the head of the hospital bed in the up position, (sort of an all fours position). That's when I entered the room and asked if her dad (the baby to be's grandpa) could come in to see her. "NO! I DON'T WANT TO FREAK HIM OUT!", she quickly responded. I told her a friend sent her love. "WHO CARES?" she snapped back.

Earlier that morning, I was sleeping in the delivery room on a chair with a pillow and blanket over me. I think Jenn responded to the morphine she took earlier that night and got sick. It was projectile vomit directed right at me. I couldn't do much except watch it fly. "Missed me", I said. Amanda the doula chuckled. We emptied the room of furniture, and a nurse came in with a bucket and mop, and cleaned it up. Then the labour continued. A few drops of puke hit my blanket, but not enough to give up sleeping in it. Puking is one of the few things Jenn remembers clearly from the ordeal.

It reminded me of The Exorcist. Don't get me wrong, Jennifer looked much more attractive than this as she wrythed in pain. She didn't LOOK like this. I just thought I would use this photo as a symbol of the feeling in the room at times.

I guess I better put in a happy picture to balance this out:

This is how I was imagining the new addition to the family would be like while the events of the previous photo was taking place.

Anyway, it all felt like a bit of a war. Thank God for our two doulas: Amanda and Aleksandra, our unbelievable nurse, Robin, and Debra Millar. Dr. Millar was the cowboy in the white hat at the end of the movie who says "all right round up the wagons, we're heading home". She called the end of the labour, and basically said. "This party is over, time for a C-section".

In minutes after Dr.Millar's call, we had our baby girl. Why 24 hours of hard labour? Who can answer that question? Except that we had no idea of the outcome at the time. Hindsight is 20/20. Jennifer was going for it, and we discussed a "vag birth" as our goal. Looking back, it could only have been done the way we did it. Pain and all.

Is she all right?

2008-07-09T20:38:00.000-07:00

Yes, BOTH Jennifer and Olivia are fine. Today we are dealing with moving from bottle feeding (learned in the hospital), to breast feeding. Tonight we managed a text book feed. Left breast 15 minutes, right breast 15 minutes, followed by expressed milk from a bottle (40 mls). Perfection! Even though Olivia is small for full term birth weight (she passed that weight with the community health nurse yesterday), she shakes her head like a dog trying to get the nipple into her mouth (breast or bottle). She has LOTS of energy, and we are happy to point it in the right direction. It's tough having visitors right now. We don't know when she will wake up, and after she eats, she is right back sleeping again. I'm sure this stage will pass soon. Right now, she is glad to be home, and so are we!

We are home!

2008-07-07T13:12:00.000-07:00

Yes, that's right. All three of us are under our own roof for the first time. Here are some pictures of Olivia at Women's Hospital on July 3rd (the day after), and in Intermediate Care at Children's Hospital over the weekend with Grandma, Grandpa, and Jennifer.

Now that we're home, we are counting formula and expressed breast milk (in milliliters), and pees and poos (in occurrences). See the chart on the left. It's not rocket science, but it will keep baby fat and healthy!

July 3rd.

2008-07-03T14:07:00.001-07:00

I'm just home for a shower, and I'm missing feeding time, but I want to post this blog: Mission accomplished! Our baby girl was born July 2nd at 7:24pm 4 lbs 14 ounces. Small, but beautiful and bright eyed. See for yourself! Everyone is doing fine!

Bill

Da - due, due, due

2008-07-01T13:01:00.000-07:00

The infamous DUE DATE. Which, as you find out, is really the middle of your due MONTH. Well, it sure was strange to be at a theatre opening last week telling people I was due in 4 days! hahahahhaha It really alarms most of the population. We also went to see some jazz at David Lam Park on Sunday (our official due date) and I was hoping not to run into anyone I know to be asked "When are you due?" to answer "uh, today".

Well, here we are Canada Day. Bill was supposed to play a gig today and I woke up with mild cramps and contractions. The first father test. He likely could have gone and I would have been fine, but never having been through this before.....we really have no idea how fast we'll zoom down this road now.

My mom and dad are on their way down from Kamloops and we are just lounging around waiting for things to kick into high gear.

The weather is fantastic, so we can sit on our patio and enjoy the relaxing time.

That's all for now folks. Check back....I have no idea how quick we will be to up date this with the news -but I hope we can just post a quick announcement.

Jennifer

Super Doula

2008-06-11T22:30:00.000-07:00

When we first found out we were expecting a baby, we had conversations with many different people about how they did things. From the information I gathered, many friends suggested having a midwife. It seemed like the right idea. a)it was covered by medical, b)it seemed like over and above the home/personal care you would get from just having a doctor c)my own doctor (who doesn't deliver babies) seemed gung-ho on the idea.

So the hunt began. (I think there is a post somewhere earlier here perhaps) Well, the long and short of it, I think we ended up with midwife or team of midwives/office that were going through a transition. Something felt almost too relaxed about each visit. For first time parents, I found that not many of the conversations were initiated by them and they felt very disorganized to say the least. I was called by the wrong name several times and a couple of appointments were re-arranged. There was just a general feeling of unsettledness. (I realize there are many great midwives out there - so this is no reflection on the profession) The bottom line - we just didn't feel as though they were really taking care of us. There were three midwives at this particular office and we had only met one up until asking if we should meet the others. The idea is if one isn't available - the others take care of you. We realized that the only other midwife we had met was leaving possible before our baby was due, another had left for a term in Africa, and a young, less experienced midwife showed up on the scene (there was even one midwife that came into our first meeting that I never saw again...I don't even know if she's still a part of that office?) I really wanted some guidance from someone with experience and it just wasn't heading that direction. Something just felt off kilter.

This is were we were in luck. The prenatal classes we signed up for through Lower Mainland Child Birthing Society were taught by two fabulous teachers (both of whom were Doulas) and we ended up asking for some advice from one of them - Aleksandra. We quickly decided that we needed to hire a doula. Now, my perception of what a doula up until this point was that they were more some esoteric, hippy-like cheerleader...haha. (of course this isn't based on any fact!) But I quickly realized that it was the support we were looking for all along. We now have switched care to one of the best obstetricians and we have the support of Aleksandra, who we feel so great about involving in our adventure into parenthood. We knew from taking classes with her that we would feel so comfortable and supported by having her around and she's already done more for us in one meeting and a phone call than we feel like we've experienced the whole way through.

Three cheers for doulas we say! And thank you Aleksandra for being there for us.

Happily heading into the homestretch

Bill & Jennifer

The Shower showdown

2008-06-09T23:43:00.001-07:00

On the weekend of May 24/25, I had THREE showers to go to. Well, one of them, unbeknownst to me was a shower - I thought it was just a party for my tap class end of year.

SATURDAY MAY 24th - I went to Centro Grill downstairs of Harbour Dance Centre and had a great dinner with Moe, Pam, Danielle, Teryl, Laura, Miyuki, Sabine and Christine. Moe was the social convener (which she does SO well...you should get into party planning Moe!)It was so nice to hang out with the people I have spent so much time at the studio with. I have known Pam and Danielle for over TWENTY years!!!!!!!!!! Yikes. We had a fabulous time catching up and they got me wonderful gifts.

Thank you so much to all of you for the wonderful gifts and taking the time to share a night with me.

SUNDAY MAY 25th
The Urban Tap Squad shower - hosted by Amy Burns and insanely delicious cake made by her mother Anita. Keri, Miyuki, Amy & I.

It was so fun to catch up with you three as it's been a while since we have tapped together. It really made me miss you all and our fun times.

Amy is the best host. There was incredible food and her place always feels so comfy and home-like. (even though EVERY TIME we go out there - Miyuki and I get COMPLETELY LOST....and we did again this time....what an adventure - thanks for driving Miyuki...I think we wasted a whole 1/4 tank of gas driving in circles..hahahah.

My tap dance buddies - thank you so much. I love you all. (see the photos)

SUNDAY MAY 25th - later that day.....
Bill and I get ready to go to (what I thought was) a tap party at Kim's house. In retrospect, Bill (who is generally comfortable scrambling around late) was anxious to get there on time. (should have clued in) He was driving over curbs and rushing me...it was odd. I didn't notice at the time.

We arrive to Kim's house (which is stunning by the way) There is a note on the door saying "year end tap party" but I can hear them in the back yard. So rather than traipse through the house, I think we should just head around to the back yard. Well, I surprised them as well!!! They were expecting me to go through the house.

The first person I saw was Bill's sister, Faye. I said "what's Faye doing here?" Just as I turn to see several other faces that are not associated particularly with the tap class. I am surprised........and THEN I turn to see MY DAD walking through the back gate.....WHAT THE?????????? and then I realize they are hiding my mother over to the other side. I was so overwhelmed that I started to cry and couldn't really get it together for the rest of the afternoon. Most of my tap students and several of our good friends were all there. It felt like an out of body experience! There was a huge pile of gifts for me to open, tons of food and all of these people I love so much STARING at me! hahahahhahah I didn't know what to do first. But of course, in true Bishop style - CRY. What a big boob. You'll note from most of the photos that I look like I'm crying in almost all of them.

Thank you to you all for being such wonderful people in my life, to my mom and dad for driving all the way down and indulging these nutty people and me. Now you know why you don't have to worry about me....I have all of these people around me that are so kind and caring.

Thanks to Kim for hosting this at your house and Barb for being my personal assistant throughout the gift opening....and again to ALL OF YOU for making such an incredible day for me.

See the photos (thank you to Tomina & Rose for taking so many great pictures!)

WE ARRIVE AND ARE SHOCKED:

Jennifer

Lazy Blogger

2008-06-09T23:29:00.000-07:00

I can't really use the pregnancy as an excuse....or wait? Maybe I can? Anyways, long overdue on an entry here. Let's summarize:

PRENATAL: we are done our prenatal classes. They were incredible and we met some new friends that are all going to be parents at the same time as us. (incidentally, another couple has had their baby now too - Congrats to Manola, Francisco and new baby Ramona!) The teachers were so great that we even hired one of them (Aleksandra) to be our Doula. She is fantastic and will be just the support we need in this process.

MIDWIFE: This case was a little disappointing. Somehow didn't feel very taken care of and because I have nothing to compare to, come out a little perplexed. Long and short - we have opted to go with a highly recommended obstetrician who has already clarified some of the muddiness we were experiencing along the way here. Much due to too many different people at BC Women's Hospital and yeah - that EMMA girl (see previous posts) Still really don't understand the process we got dragged through. If one more person quoted me a different due date - I thought I might scream. It's amazing how many different interpretations we got of one situation over the course of a few months. It began to feel like a sitcom. I'm sure if we recorded it, it would prove for some really funny listening. Thank God Bill came with me to all of my appointments - otherwise I would have felt insane with all the conflicting information. It just goes to confirm how pro-active we all need to be in our own health care.

All is great. Not long now - we are on a solid track heading towards meeting our new baby. This weekend we went to Whistler to get away for a few days ( I had mild panic for a moment thinking "I could go into labour up here?") We had a fabulous dinner at the Bearfoot Bistro and stayed at The Westin. The last hurrah so to speak.

I have all of my new little baby things washed and put away on the shelf in their little baskets.(I am my mother's daughter after all!) Along with the cloth diapers (I know there are some of you that are dying to hear me go through with the cloth diaper thing.....you'll hear about it!) I have acquired yet MORE baby things from my good friend Jennifer. (Thanks JC!) I met with her and her son Cian at Little Nest, this amazing restaurant right by us designed for parents and little ones.

We have fabulous new patio furniture that my mom bought me for my birthday that I look forward to using this summer (of course it would have to actually get WARM!)

I think that sums up most of what's happening up to today? See the next post for a long overdue post about the insane baby shower my wacky tap students set up for me (you guys are crazy!)

Jennifer

THE REALITY CHECK

2008-05-22T14:33:00.001-07:00

So last week arrive to prenatal class and we look around to see one of the fathers sitting by himself. No one is necessarily aknowledging this, but I'm sure most of us notice. The instructor begins by announcing that she will let him speak once she gets through her first bit of info. At this point (I know I was) we are all thinking "where is his wife? oh god, did something terrible happen?" I'm not sure I was evening listening to what the instructor was saying.

After what seemed like an hour, she addressed him and he spoke up to say "On Monday Kyla had our baby!" DOH!!!!!!!!! HOLD ON A SECOND????????? AREN'T WE ALL DUE IN JUNE?

Turns out she was 2 weeks further along than me. Which means she had her baby a month early. Good thing, the little guy was already 6pounds 9oz. The inspiring part was that everything went well and they had a fantastic delivery, healthy baby and mom.

But now the reality that we are in the zone when it could really happen anytime. We weren't really thinking about that. I think Bill began to understand my anxiety in wanting to get things done around here.

Even though June 29th is the date........it's really up to the baby to decide when it wants to join us.

Stay tuned. You never know what you'll read next here!

EEEEK

Jennifer

DECISIONS, DECISIONS

2008-05-07T18:00:00.000-07:00

There are decisions galore in this whole baby business and an abundancy of advice (solicited and un) as to what we should do.

CIRCUMCISION: Up until this point in my life, this was generally untalked about. But now I'm finding myself randomly discussing it with anyone I know who had a boy. I'm not even embarrassed to say the word loud enough for the person at the next table to hear. God, is this me turning into one of those "mother" type people who have no shame - discussing poop, genitalia, etc? oh no

VACCINATION: Please don't express your opinion on this, I'm confused enough. There is so much information out there and most of it seems to be black or white. This one is still on the table for discussion.

DIAPERING: I have been told that cloth diapering is great. The aspiring environmentalist in me is ready to jump on that ride. One thing for certain, I am NOT contributing to the demise of this earth by using disposables. No, not I/we. I am told that having the baby for the first while is overwhelming enough and that a diaper service would be good to have. Well, I look at this way - Bill and I have all summer to try out our new parenting skills and get into the swing of things. Our friends are doing their own diapers at home and seem to be doing well. See, I don't MIND doing laundry and our laundry room is generally not that busy. So doing a load every couple of days doesn't seem too bad. In comparsion, it is more cost efficient and more environmentally sound. We're just going to go for it. There are some great products out there that make things easier. See link below on a comparison: (cut and paste the link below...the link options isn't working on my blog for some reason)

www.hipbaby.com/Text/1179334396312-5830/pC/1156784512794-8781/Shop-Change

THANK GOD WE DON'T HAVE TO WORRY ABOUT CONSIDERING THIS FOR OUR NEWBORN: (cut and paste here too)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZYzCcxF2IzE

Today is my birthday. Perhaps the last hurrah before someone else begins to steal the stage at this time of year. I'm so lucky to have so many great people around me that it's more like a birthWEEK. I had appies and drinks with friends on Sunday night, this morning I was serenaded on both of my voicemails by Auntie Sharon & Uncle Henry(apparently they called a wrong number between and sang to a stranger?),my sister put a funny video birthday message on facebook (amongst the pages of birthday wishes there), had a great chat with my mom and dad, Bill has planned to have people over to share birthday cake with us tonight, and Saturday night 3 of my close girlfriends are taking me out for birthday dinner.

Spoilt with a capital S.

Happy Birthday to me and thanks everyone, for reading along with us in our adventure.

xo
Jennifer

APRIL/MAY SHOWERS

2008-05-02T16:25:00.001-07:00

show·er: –noun
1. a large supply or quantity: a shower of wealth.

2. a party given for a bestowal of presents of a specific kind, esp. such a party for a prospective bride or prospective mother: a linen shower; a baby shower.

3. a fall of many objects, as tears, sparks, or missiles.

–verb (used with object)
4. to bestow liberally or lavishly.

5. to deluge (a person) with gifts, favors, etc.: She was showered with gifts on her birthday.

Wow, how lucky can you get. I have so many generous people in my life that I believe our kid will not do without.

UMBELLICAL BEANIE: From Sarah & Michael. Way back in December, before New Years (see other post)

BRONWEN'S BABY BLANKIE: See other post for picture.

LOOT BAG OF VARIOUS TREASURES: Kendra, Eric and Baby Larkin gave us a whole bag of clothes, a bjorn and a bouncy seat from their collection. The never ending flow of baby things. I hope to keep the flow going to someone else. Thanks for sharing the train of goods!

SWING: See my post about Auntie Sharon & Uncle Henry and the swing they bought us.

THE YELLOW AND WHITE ALL ENCOMPASSING BABY WINDFALL: My mom and dad were down recently and my mom bought us several onesies, a hooded towel, blanket, receiving blankets, little mitts, sleepers, (one that says "I love my family" on it)a few nightgowns, and the bonus pack of Penaten. Thanks Grandma.

GRACO PACK & PLAY: Thank you to my crazy Tuesday night tap gang "TAP GEEKS" for surprising me with a Graco Pack & Play. I'm sure they have an ulterior motive - this is so I have somewhere to plant the baby when I come back to teach in September. (see the picture)

TEETHING TOY & BLANKET: Cute little duck teething toy and a nice snuggly white blanket. From Anne in my Saturday tap class, so sweet of you!

GOLDEN TREASURY BOOKS: One of my tap students, Diana spotted these at a weekend garage sale. I love these little books. (There's actually a funny recording of me at about 5 or 6 years old reading through the list of books in the back of one, telling the listening audience which ones I personally owned)

I've had comments saying that we don't have any BIG stuff on our list. Well, here's a few reasons why:

STROLLER: See other posts. We won a fancy shmancy one. No need for purchase!

BASSINETTE: See other post. We have Bill's bassinette and we have had a mattress made for it.

CRIB: Our friends Jill & Greg with kids Thora, Tova & Jonas have given us their great convertible crib (converts to a toddler bed) from Ikea. Leksvik collection. We may end up getting more of this line of furniture once we have moved to a bigger place and can accommodate more furniture.

Really, how much could one little, tiny person need? In the day and age of trying to minimalize and be environmentally aware, I'm trying to collect less things. That being said, I don't want to poop all over the excitement people have for buying baby gifts. Some of the things out there are pretty irresistable.

Your participation in our adventure is really the most amazing thing we could ask for. I feel like we have so many great people around us for support, we are so lucky. What more could we need?

If you are still really stuck and feel the need to contribute in some way, I have started a savings account for the baby. It is in my name at Vancity Savings. Once the baby is born, we will be looking into some RESPs etc. #871798 (remember, we won't ever have to pay for piano or dancing lessons!!!...but maybe hockey????? who knows)

xo
Jennifer

A POLL for all of YOU!

2008-04-11T17:19:00.000-07:00

So, the guesses are flying around. Boy or girl?

It really has highlighted to me that we are stuck on identifying babies by what colour they wear. In my brain, I think defiantly "What does it matter if a baby boy was wearing pink, or a baby girl blue?" But why? why does it seem sort of okay that a baby girl wears blue and not so okay for a baby boy to wear pink? Is this just MY neuroses? Are we so conditioned to think certain colours are masculine or feminine? Do we need to impose this kind of pressure on a newborn?

But of course the other part of me wants to save having to explain the gender and just go with the imposed colour coding of babies.

Some of the people wanting to buy baby clothing are at odds as to what colour to buy. Couldn't there be more neutral coloured clothing? It's such a funny thing. One of the sites I was on even made you choose which gender your baby was before they even let you LOOK at clothing.

LOW BELLY: People say because I am "carrying low" that it means I am having a boy. Another person even said because I didn't have morning sickness that it was a boy. I don't really have a strong feeling either way and to tell you the truth, I don't really care as long as it's a human!

WHAT DO YOU THINK? Comment and give your vote.

Jennifer

Who is EMMA anyways?

2008-04-07T23:44:00.000-07:00

So, in the process of this whole adventure, I have learned some startling things:

1) I am a geriatric mother. Yes, GERIATRIC. Didn't think I would hear that word for well over 40 years.

2) The word RISK and how it can poke you in the eye or sound like someone is screaming it in the middle of a regular sentence.

3) How the medical profession is really less about people and more about science experiments, statistics, politics, and money. (sorry to those of you who are my friends that are in the medical world...let me rant here for a bit)

I am 38 years old and feel like I am in the body of someone 25. When I think of the things I have done in my life, I seriously feel like there is no way I have been alive long enough to have experienced all that I have. But, I get lumped into the RISK category of being "Advanced Maternal Age" (which means anyone over 35)

Within this, of course is the suggestion that you test for extra things you might not otherwise test for. In allowing that little door to open a crack, suddenly you could wind up being part of a drive for statistics.

Now, don't get me wrong. I feel so fortunate that in Canada we have the amazing medical system we have. Most of the time I feel like the general public has way to much expectation and takes for granted the services that we have. But in this situation, I am a super healthy, pregnant woman and if I had never indulged in wanting to have some tests done, I wouldn't have opened myself up for this monitoring.

My blood pressure has ranged anywhere between 110/75 to 115/80
I have gained approximately 15 pounds or so (maybe more...haven't weighed in a bit)
The baby's heart rate has been between 130 and 150
I have seen all of it's limbs (minus the gender determining bits) and it has all it's fingers, toes, nice long legs, what look like big feet, all the necessary compartments in the brain, heart, liver. It even turned to me today and yawned as it tried to shield itself from the ultrasound waves. (no pictures please!) It is thumping gently on my bladder right now as I speak.

So, what I keep asking is...if I had never asked for ANY tests, would they be worried about anything being wrong with me? The tests they give you are screens and not diagnostics. Meaning that you are put on a graph and there is a large number of "false positives" (this term makes me crazy) So, because it looked like something "might" (another maddening, non specific word) be high, they launch me into what they call the

EMMA CLINIC

Now, the Emma Clinic is a research project started by a doctor named Dr. VonDaedelson (sp?) They are doing studies to help determine why people end up with any range of complications from low birth weight, to pre-eclampsia and as far as still birth. I am so low on the end of "low risk" that it's silly. They just need me to round out their research. As I waited in the examining room the other day I even noticed that they are actively RECRUITING people to do what I am doing. And all because I was curious and made myself open and available for the first test.

I asked the Dr why I couldn't find anything about the Emma Clinc on line and he said something about intellectual property and how they were still in the developmental stages. This sounds creepy and like some bad movie to me.

That being said. My midwife gets a good giggle when Bill and I show up and negotiate how little we have to deal with these people. She is willing to go along with us and feels confident that we can work together with her and involve EMMA as little as possible.

I went today for a measurement ultrasound and everything seemed like it was great. I noticed as she typed on my file that she read that they had suggested I go back every two weeks for tests and she inquired as to whether I had booked another appointment. I told her no, that my midwife and I would schedule it if need be.

All through this, I can't help but be reminded that this is just the beginning of dealing with these kind of issues. Once the child is out...then we will be dealing with all sorts of controversial topics like vaccines etc.

Training...it's training for being a mother. Just like he millions of times I have to get up and pee in the night. I'm getting really good a the sleep walking pee.

Glad I had an audience to rant to.

Thanks and good night all!

Jennifer

Gifty McGifterton

2008-04-07T11:39:00.000-07:00

Gift registries....hmmm. There's something about making a big list of things and sending it to people that makes me feel a little queazy. It feels so presumptious, expectant (much like my basketball belly is beginning to feel) But I guess in order to get what you need and avoid getting 3 of something you already have, it could be considered organized and efficient. Which I AM comfortable with.

Still.....eee, it makes me feel a little strange making these lists. That being said, it WAS fun to go through and see all the amazing new things you can get for this new addition to our family.

I have recently acquired a great bag of clothing that is being passed around our theatre community and it's so great that everyone is able to hand down things to each other. I hope to be able to do the same with all the things I'm sure to collect over the next years. In fact, please be sure to keep me posted, as with the rate babies seem to grow out of things, I'm SURE I will be looking for some lucky person to pass many of my goodies on to.

Here is a list of the places I have registered on line. (stay tuned as I am still going to go visit The Bay to get set up there)

www.gollygeezbaby.com
look me up: jennifer@s2sproductions.com

www.tjskids.com
look me up: Jennifer Bishop

www.toysrus.ca
look me up: Jennifer Bishop or #40587430

www.crocodilebaby.com
look me up: #1859

www.sears.ca
look me up: Jennifer Bishop/#200809245294

Stay tuned for some new posts from us! (we are a little behind)

Jennifer

THE FIRST BIG GIFT!

2008-03-12T15:02:00.000-07:00

A special thanks to my Auntie Sharon & Uncle Henry in Calgary for the wonderful new swing they bought us. I just picked it up at Babies R Us. From what I have been told this new unit will be a godsend. It swings forward and back as well as side to side. The picture from the site shows some strangely uncluttered, sterile home and a baby that won't be nearly as cute as ours, but you get the idea.

When I was a baby, apparently I was the greatest accessory for Auntie Sharon & Uncle Henry. (see the pics of me and Auntie Sharon, my sister and I with Uncle Henry and the very groovy Aunt & Uncle pic) When they came to our house I used to sit on the back of the couch and comb my Uncle's (quickly thinning) hair.

Thank you AUNTIE SHARON & UNCLE HENRY! I can't even imagine how much I will appreciate this gift. I'm sure once the baby is born, I will be thanking you again!

Love Jennifer

B is for.....

2008-02-26T12:13:00.000-08:00

BABY BILL, BLANKET (by Bronwen)AND BASSINETTE

One fantastic thing about having a pack rat family (sorry Costin family...but hey, it's a GOOD thing here!) is that you actually still have things that were around when you were a baby! Thank you Edna (Bill's mom) and Faye (Bill's sister) for keeping this around long enough for Bill to need it again.

Bill came home from his Nanaimo commute a few weeks ago with HIS baby bassinette! The proof is in the picture. There is baby Bill in his bassinette.

Finding bedding for these things seems to be fairly tricky. My mom seems hot on the trail and has discovered some sets of bedding by Kushies that may do the trick. If not, we may consider getting a mattress and bumpers made by Dream Design which is up the street from us.

It just so happens that my friend Bronwen had been talking about making baby blankets. Check out the cute one she made for me. She goes into production with these in summer or early fall, so if you're interested- she has some other designs and will be taking orders. Let me know and I will put you in touch with her.

Check it out. (pretty cute baby too eh?)

Jennifer

Midwife contemplation

2008-02-15T23:02:00.000-08:00

In the midst of this whole new phase of my life, I have heard every version under the sun of child birth from various sources. The birthing "pool", "home" births, "natural" childbirth, Cesareans, 48 hour labours, induced labours, doulas, birth coaches, midwives, obstetricians, premature births, St.Paul's Hospital, BC Women's. I have a plethora of baby birthing info rattling around in my head.

Someone make it stop.

Decision making has never really been my strength. (some of you who think I'm stubborn or opinionated are probably rolling your eyes right now.....Mom?)

Well, I had heard all of these different things about Doulas & Midwives so I began to look into it myself. We knew one thing for certain between, us - we want the baby born in a hospital.

After speaking to so many different people, my question was - how would my experience be different if I were to have a midwife vs not?

It seems with a midwife, the amount of time spent in your visits leading up the birth is more and you are able to access them for things that may seem menial to bug a doctor with. Afterall, these people have decided to do nothing but deal with pregnant women and childbirth exclusively. It was all explained to me. I really like the fact that they are with you from the time you go into labour, until a few hours after your baby is delivered. They then do follow up visits to your home for the couple of weeks after. (a public health nurse does this if you don't have a midwife) I figured it would be nice to have someone who is an expert that follows us through the whole process and knows our concerns and wishes.

I have since heard a few skeptical comments from people who have asked their doctors, or people who are involved with doctor types. I'm not sure what the politics are, but there tends to be SOME opposition with certain doctors. My doctor - was very supportive of the whole concept and she is the best doctor ever.

So now Bill and I have officially been to two visits with our midwives (there are a small group of them that deal with you - we've met two of them so far) The care that I receive each time is really nice. They spend about 45 minutes talking to you. Do all the regular stuff like blood pressure etc. We heard the baby's hearbeat again - this time Bill heard it!

Next up...a blood glucose test to ensure I'm not at risk for gestational diabetes.

Jennifer

THE BUMBLERIDE FLYER

2008-02-15T22:45:00.000-08:00

Well, we have offically acquired our first of the larger baby paraphanalia. A few weeks back I attended "Vancouver's Largest Baby Shower". I realized as I visited the website the day of, that I was suppose to have registered and that the doors opened in the morning. Oh well, I figured I would take my chances and stop by later in the day.

By the time I had got there, all the free goodies had been given out and it looked like many of the businesses displaying their wares were packing up. I looked at some kind of new cloth diaper service, (which turned out to be some kind of synthetic fibre of some sort?) and brushed quickly past some horrible item that holds TWO breast pumps in place so you can have your hands free!!! What the ?!@!#$!@#%? It looked like some bizarre S&M accessory?! Who wants to have TWO of those things attached to you AND be doing something else at the same time? I mean THAT is multi-tasking far beyond my capability. eeeeeeeee. Talked to a group of Midwives (see next post) and set up a meeting to go speak with them.

My friend Barb and I took a quick look around and decided to enter the two draws that were at the front door as we were on our way out. (incidentally, I am now being sent baby info from every possible business in town....Barb? you must be too? hahah) We then wrote the whole thing off and decided to have lunch at the vegetarian restaurant down the block.

Well as it turns out, of the masses of people who attended (and lined up VERY early) I won one of the two big prizes. A Bumbleride Flyer Stroller! (see picture - it's the exact colour too) I received a phone call from one of the organizers that night and arranged to pick it up the next morning. It's really great. It pops up and down in a snap and it has a universal click system that many car seats will fit. (Thanks Barb! - we'll never know who of us won it...but you doubled my chance!)

So now that one item is out of the way. On to the car seat, high chair...ugh - breast pump? ....that one I'm not so excited about. (it seems I need to get over the concept of my breasts being pumped huh.....?) I guess we will be able to commiserate with some other people when we start prenatal classes.

I think Bill should practice holding one of the cats as he folds and unfolds the stroller with his free hand. This could be good training. Afterall, babies can be really wiggly, right? (minus the claws I guess)

Jennifer (I think I have swallowed a children's size basketball)

Reactions to the news

2008-01-24T21:25:00.000-08:00

By now most people have found out that we, (ok Jennifer) are (is) pregnant. The reactions to our news have been varied. I don't remember reacting to anyone's baby announcements in the past. It was never on my radar to jump up and down with excitement over prenatal announcements. I used to think: "well, if you wanna do that...", but I didn't necessarily get excited about other people having babies and families.

Of course now it's different. Now it's ours, and we're excited. When we told our friends and family over the last month, we got reactions from "Oh God!", "Well you'll have to move", and "Are you going to get married then?" to "Oh, you two will be great parents", "That is so great", and "I didn't think you had any lead left in the pencil".

That last comment was for me from the men I told. It was amazing. About 80% of the males had a similiar comment. I didn't know this response. Of course! A joke about the possibility of not being virile enough to get the job done. All the guys know it. I didn't, but now I'll join in on unsuspecting future dads with similair jokes in the future. Maybe I'll try: "I didn't know there were any tadpoles left in the stream" or, "I thought Elvis had left the building". I'll keep working on this.

The women have different responses. The ones who've had kids are mostly happy for us. You can tell some of them had rough times raising kids. "You're too old for this" one said. I know I'm too old. So what? Then there are the women who want a child, but can't conceive, or aren't in a serious relationship and want kids now. We feel for you, and are hoping for the best, but right now we're dealing with the fact that our baby is unborn, and I just broke the news to Jennifer that I think I had quite a large head when I was a kid. Hope that's not genetic. Ouch.

-Bill

The Doppler Effect

2008-01-18T19:43:00.000-08:00

Monday January 14th, I threw myself out of bed and rush to get ready to head downtown for a doctor's appointment. Well, as it turns out, I screwed up the time and had to re-schedule. (is this the beginning of what everyone is calling "baby-brain"?)

Thursday Bill and I head down to the office. I thought it would be just a routine check up, pee, weigh, blood pressure etc. (To be honest I was beginning to worry a little. I haven't really had many symptoms that are talked of. I never got any morning sickness, I'm not really that much more tired than I would be at this time of year, I don't seem to be eating more. My tummy IS however sporting a different kind of firmer bulge than normal.) I told Bill just to wait as I didn't think any of this would be important stuff for him to be there for. Well, little did I know....I was in for THE DOPPLER! Wow, technology is amazing. Like a mini, portable sort of ultrasound with a speaker on it. Dr. Clarke found a beating heart and explained to me that it was the baby's as it was much faster than an adult heartbeat. Junior was pumpin' a good 150! What a relief to hear that! Now it seems as though I'm more aware that there's someone in there. To know that the heart was beating that strong and quick........unbelievable really.

It's nice now to not just be feeling fat, but feeling like there is really something there to show for it.

More to come soon! My next ultrasound is on February 6th and this week we arrange prenatal classes, a possible midwife and our meeting with BC Women's hospital.

New Year's Eve and Maternity wear break through.

2008-01-02T20:52:00.000-08:00

On the morning of the 31st, we got in the car and headed for Seattle at 9:30am. The border had no wait at all, which was a pleasant surprise. With one stop at Bellis Fair to hit Target and the Food Fair we hit our destination, The Westin in downtown Seattle by about 2:30pm. A quick jaunt around the neighbourhood to hit Macy's and Nordstroms and then back to the hotel to get ready for dinner.

An observation I made from combing through Bellis Fair and all the amazing sales....maternity wear. How the hell does it work? Now, some of you who know me, know I'm not the most patient shopper. (Bill will vouch for that..the slightest distraction and I give up) When you walk into some of these stores or even maternity sections of department stores...it seems as though you are destined to look a certain way. Well, what if you just never dressed like that to begin with? Flowers and bell sleeves. Just because my stomach is going to bulge out doesn't mean I need extra room in my wrists. Or are you supposed to suddenly fly away with those sleeves? Well, my first venture into the THOUGHT of having to wear "special" clothing for my new state was mind numbing. After speaking to our friends Michael and Sarah in Seattle, I was informed they actually have stuffing for you to try clothing on with to get an idea what it will look like with a big belly. I'm not sure I could go through that process without dying of laughter. Sarah also tipped me to Old Navy which is much more up my alley as far as clothing styles go. Less flowers, more cargo pant, t-shirt kinda girl. I'm proud to say that I found an incredible sale and picked up a pair of MATERNITY cargo pants (funny big fold over stretchy waist band) a MATERNITY pink velour track suit and then I stepped over to the "normal" section to pick up some other yoga style pants that measured the same in the waist as the maternity pants. These combined with a few new plain coloured t-shirts in size L and I was set for $70 US! (Thanks Sarah!)

New Years eve we went to a great burger joint, Two Bells Tavern with Michael & Sarah and had one of the most amazing burgers I have ever had served up by a waiter that should apply at the Elbow Room here in Vancouver. After dinner we went and checked out some live music at a great restaurant/bar called The Triple Door. The music was great and there was no cover charge. Our table was reserved for a party at 10pm so we head out realizing we just weren't the party animals we all aspired to be. (at least Michael & Sarah had the excuse of Griffin, their 20month year old son to fall back on) Bill and I hit the bar at our hotel where things were roaring along at a good pace. The hotel was packed for the night with people that were ready to party. Well, mom and dad....I guess I shouldn't laugh at you packing it in so early...we were in bed barely able to watch the countdown at 11:30pm.

Just after midnight I awoke to the sound of a full on cocktail party in the hallway outside our door. Now who wants to be the party poop to complain about people having a good time on New Year's Eve? Not me....I just sat and eavesdropped on what sounded like a CRAZY party. As they trickled into one of the suites down the hallway, one lone soul was left talking on her cell phone. In that "too loud to be sober" tone, she was discussing the logistics of relations with another couple with the male of that party.(that's the polite version) It was seriously like listening to a bad movie. I had a good chuckle and went back to sleep. In the morning as we packed up to leave our room we crunched over a mass of potato chips that littered the entire hallway outside our door. Wasn't that a party?!

Michael met us in the lobby and we got to spend a few hours in the life of Super Daddy. Mommy (Sarah) was out with her mother, so Michael came and met us with Griffin. He was so well behaved until we hauled him in and out of the car more than once and then he decided he'd had enough. It's amazing how soothing a piece of bread with peanut butter can be. He was soon asleep, clutching his peanut butter snack, head bobbing, little eyes rolling around trying to stay open. We let them head on their way for a nap and we did a bit more shopping, had lunch and head for Vancouver.

It was great talking to Sarah and Michael as they had so many great ideas and resources that they are passing on to us from their experience. Sarah knit a little hat she called an "umbilical cord" hat. Our first baby gift!

All in all a great way to kick off 2008 and our year of brand new adventures.

The First Ultrasound

2007-12-29T08:31:00.000-08:00

After seeing "Knocked Up" the movie, I was expecting a big probe about the size of a fat turkey baster to be used from the inside to see the ultrasound image. Thank God that didn't happen. The movie prop was used for comedy only.

The real life scene involved a tool on the outside of the stomache. Phew! I get the feeling there are more reasons to peel myself off the wall of a hospital room to come. I asked what that thing moving on the screen was. The technician said "that's the heart beating". Good sign!

Bill

The First Ultrasound

2007-12-28T19:17:00.000-08:00

So, gladly I didn't pee all over everyone in the lobby waiting for this ultrasound. They asked me to drink 32 oz of water. Two big glasses. Didn't really seem like that much....but all at once, knowing that you have to hold it in?.....YIKES! The worst thing was the water cooler in the waiting area. It seemed like everyone there took turns filling up (glug, glug, slosh....) Oh god, I seriously thought my bladder was going to rupture. The nurse barely formed a "J" and I was up and running down the hall right at her.

It turns out I really only needed to drink less than HALF of what they told me. My bladder was so full: Bill asked "What's that big black area?". And it was, indeed, my bladder. Now, have you ever had to go pee that bad and had someone specify how much you could let out? Yeah right, like that's gonna happen. Fortunately it was a fair amount and much of a relief.

The photo doesn't really look like much, but we actually saw fingers and a leg even extend. At one point we got a face on view and the skull looked like a miniature alien!

It was all very good to know that we weren't just imagining the whole thing and that I do, indeed have a small person starting inside me. I don't think anyone could ever realize how amazing the idea is until you go through it. It's crazy to think we were all that small. 5 cm!

Have a look.

Jennifer